I recently had a very interesting conversation with a very intelligent guy. PhD and all.
We joked a lot, he talked about his passions, Buddhism, and how he loves training dogs. Then it was my turn to talk about my business and what it is that I do for work. It’s such a funny topic because I get such an array of different reactions and responses. Most people nod, giggle and tell me about how it’s a brilliant idea and that my services are much needed in Seattle. That wasn’t the reaction this guy had. He listened, kept a straight face, and after a long 30 second quiet period said “You help people by making them superficial”. I said nothing, but I’m pretty sure my face didn’t hide my feelings as I’ve previously been escorted out of settings where my facial expression screamed Save Me. I was quiet and wanted to understand his perspective and reasoning, and tried my best to not let this be about me and feel attacked. He then said “I know I need a makeover, but I’ll never lower myself to that level”. Again, my own ego was dying to go nuts with this one. Me 2 years ago would have interpreted this as a personal attack on not only my business, passion and life purpose, but this “ass hole” thinks that looking good is actually lowering yourself to a level than no respectable intellect would or should do. I had to dig deeper and of course, this front was because of some insecurity, rejection, and a pain he was covering up.
By taking the time to look good, you’re actually accepting yourself, loving yourself, and telling the world that you respect yourself enough to make an effort. Self-respect, self-acceptance, and self-love are musts when it comes to being a successful, happy, & fulfilled human being. It all starts within oneself.
You can neglect your appearance and say “I don’t care what people think” all you want, but it’s clear to everyone, including yourself, that you don’t give a shit about yourself. How can you or why would you put in the necessary effort in any other part of your life? You owe it to yourself to do some digging within to figure out why you’re looking like a mess or judge the people who are well put-together.
Please don’t limit yourself. Get out of your own way of living the best life. Accept who you are and grow from there.