We’ve been raised in a society that looks down upon people having feelings and emotions. We’re taught that getting upset is a sign of weakness. Crying is what babies do. We go through life hearing over and over that independence is the key to happiness; that self-sufficiency is the ideal way to live. We don’t allow ourselves to get upset when we’re let down. We train ourselves to have less and less expectations for people around us, so that we avoid feeling…anything, really. Our friendships consist of interactions in a virtual world, or outings to places where we barely talk about anything meaningful.
Men, especially, are judged and made fun of for having feelings. So we’re left with guys who are scared to feel anything. They avoid situations that involve any kind of emotion. They train themselves to be immune – which means they allow themselves to feel nothing. No fear, no pain, no attachment.
Why do we idealize a life of independence? Why are more and more of us building walls that get in the way of us and our feelings? How can our relationships have any depth or meaning if our connections are so superficial?
I think that life gets more meaning if we’re vulnerable and allow ourselves to feel. We’re put on this planet full of people because we need human contact and interaction. We need companionship and relationships. But those relationships need emotion, and connection, and depth. It’s ok to Need someone. To be hurt. To be scared. To Love.
The walls that we ourselves have built prevent us from having meaningful relationships in our life.
I challenge you, and myself to FEEL more. To allow yourself to be vulnerable. To remove the mask, the persona you’re putting out there and Be Real. Allow yourself to feel.